I'm a bit baffled as to why you wrote this the way you did. I assume that because the story is a "mirror," readers are meant to be able to recognize it as essentially a copy of Liam O'Flaherty's "The Sniper," with elves and bows in the place of the warring Irish factions and their guns. And by copy, I mean sentence for sentence, swapping out references to one world for another, but keeping O'Flaherty's charactertization and action. (And a stoat sandwich would taste absolutely wretched. Honestly!)
This means it's not an original piece by any stretch of the imagination, and it doesn't add any new layers of meaning to "The Sniper" either. If it was a writing exercise, that's fine, but I can't say I care much for the presentation.