(Oops, I haven't posted comments yet? Nobody else has either? I guess this is why the old business rule, "never put out press releases or fanfics around holidays" exists!)
I'm always intrigued by Kelsey stories (even the ones where his only role is to wave goodbye as the protagonist goes off to adventure with her REAL friends) although I feel compelled to remind everyone, once again, that it's not like we require that a certain percentage of PPG fanfics involve him.
I especially enjoyed the first few chapters, although I was confused by the ending--not because you left the TOB story unresolved but because you didn't really choose a note of closure. We have these new companions, we've met Balthazar and are heading off to Sendai... and, finito? If you're looking for a mixed message of "the deed done, but more to come" I'd say that ending after resolving Marlowe and his daughter, with perhaps some brief reflection on the endless tasks ahead, would leave us with the sense that the door had been closed. Here, I really had to double-take that you meant to end the story.
But, any time you need that creative break, feel free to share, as they say in the business, more please.