I didn't notice Juhani whining. She kept telling me how great I was, and yes she talked about how her life used to be difficult (it did, very much)
Because it was compressed into too few dialogues, it came across as whining, to me.
and there was sometimes that "I can't talk to you anymore until X happens so I'm going to pretend to get huffy" a la NWN which is really annoying
I never did finish NWN so I'm not sure what you're talking about.
I wanted a Canderous romance
I'm right there with you - someone who was level headed, if evil, and dealt with things as they came up instead of waiting for you to come along (so they could whine about their major life crisis they've obviously not dealt with) and make them better so they can then fall in love with you, if they haven't already. Don't these writers know how emotionally sick that is? Or don't they care?