CHAPTER 5 --Ryniel--
Night. A thousand glittering stars, giving the surroundings a soft, otherworldly glow. The moon was mostly hidden, had refused to come out and play tonight. I had retreated here, away from the formal, courtly traditions of the festivities inside. I snorted, the rich and self-righteous may have their good qualities, but they sure throw a dull party.
"My lady…forgive the intrusion…"
Without turning, I answer, a smile spreading across my lips. "Not at all, SIR Anomen."
I heard him chuckle, something he had been doing more and more frequently since his test had been completed. "Ah, I believe that are you the first to address me as such," he grinned coming to stand beside me. "Sir Anomen," he repeated quietly, rolling the words slowly in his mouth, as if trying to get used to the feel of them.
"You’re missing your party," I pointed out. "I’m sure that there are those anxious to congratulate you."
He waved his hand dismissively, and stared at me quite seriously. "They can wait. There…there is something I must speak with you about. It…it is a matter of utmost importance."
Uh-oh. Whenever Ano starts stuttering like that, I know there’s something weighing pretty heavily on his mind. He made several abortive attempts at speaking. To this day I still do not understand what it is about me that makes him so damn nervous.
His hands were drumming on the stone railing. It was making *me* nervous just watching him! I couldn’t stand it anymore, impulsively I grabbed his hands, and held them still. I heard him suck in a huge breath of air, and I sensed that he was quite terrified. I wanted to laugh, but I choked it down somehow. I don’t think his pride would have *ever* recovered if I had started giggling at that point.
"Anomen," I told him. "Whatever it is, just say it. It can’t be that horrible. We’ve fought and slain liches and dragons, next to that having a conversation with me should be a simple enough task."
He gave a rueful smile. "One would think so, no? Ah, you are right, as always my lady. What I would say is simply this: I owe my every happiness to you. Without you, I would be not standing here now, a full knight of The Order,"
I opened my mouth to protest, be he gestured for silence.
"Please, do not say anything, or I will never be able to finish," he said, beginning to talk much faster than before. "Ryniel…I…you have taken a much dearer place in my heart than that of a mere friendship. You have smitten me, both with your beauty and your kindness. I have hidden my feelings for you thus far, but fear I can do so no longer. I…oh, Ryniel," he sighed, and to my surprise, he suddenly leaned forward and kissed me.
A flood of emotions passed through me as his lips brushed against mine. Shock. Confusion. And yes, I admit, a twinge of desire.
There was a sudden and sharp crash to my left, towards the entryway to the main hall. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the fleeing form of Kelsey.
Gods! No, this can’t be happening…
I pulled back, and gasped, "Kelsey!" before I could stop myself. Quickly, I clapped my hands over my mouth and stared at a dumbfounded Anomen. But the damage was done.
"Anomen, I…" I began softly.
"Nay, do not say anything," he said with hurt and bitterness in his voice. "Go to him, if that is what you wish."
I took a couple of steps away from him, towards the door, then turned to look at Anomen one last time. He was staring out into the courtyard below, and his eyes were shining, and I knew that it wasn’t because of the starlight.
"Anomen…" I reached up and touched his cheek gently. "Will you be okay?"
"Just go. Please," he choked out.
I fled.
Through the crowded banquet hall, down the steps, out into the open air once again. Anomen standing just above me, no, don’t think about that, out to the streets, Kelsey, where are you?
I caught up to him several blocks away from the Order of the Most Radiant Heart. "Kelsey!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. He kept going. "Kelsey, would you please stop?" I tried again, to no avail. Finally, in complete and utter desperation I took a flying leap and tackled him. We tumbled to the ground, bruising and scraping against the uneven cobblestones of the street.
Gasping for breath, he disentangled himself from me, and scrambled a couple of yards away. Sitting there, glaring at me, his voice dripping with acid, he spoke "Leave me be."
"No," I replied stubbornly. "Kelsey, give me a chance to explain…"
"Why should I?" He shot back, incredulous at the very suggestion.
"BECAUSE YOU’RE A REASONABLE PERSON!" I screamed at him, my voice cracking. "Or at least I always *thought* you were!"
At that he fell silent, and gazed at me impassively. I sensed that it was now or never, so I quickly began to speak, words pouring out of my mouth in a vast, almost incoherent flood.
"It’s not what you think, really its not. Anomen, he kissed me, I wasn’t expecting it, but he did and then you walked in, and I heard you and…and…dammit Kelsey, I don’t LOVE him I love you and I just wish that this had never happened. As if I don’t have ENOUGH pain, Dyhanier and Khalid are dead because of ME and Imoen is missing and now I’m gonna lose you toooooooooo," my last word turned into a wail as I felt the tears welling up in my eyes, all the pain and loss and feelings of hopelessness I had been keeping at bay all this time finally spilling over. I curled up, right there in the middle of the street, and sobbed, my body shaking, and I honestly didn’t give a damn at that moment whether I lived or died.
Gradually I became aware that there was a gentle hand resting on my back, Kelsey’s, and I allowed him to pull me towards him. He wrapped his arms tightly around me, and I leaned against his chest, my sobs gradually subsiding as he stroked my head and rocked me ever so slightly, like Gorion used to when I was just a child and suffering from dreadful night terrors, unspeakable evils that would begin to appear for real later in my life.
When I had finally fallen into silence, Kelsey spoke softly, his voice barely above a whisper, "Ryniel, I’m so sorry."
"No, I should be the one apologizing," I began, only to be shushed. Kelsey placed one finger on my lips, preventing me from going any further.
"I leaped to conclusions, and I didn’t trust you, and for that I am sorry," he sighed, and idly twirled a strand of my hair around his finger. "The last thing I ever wanted to do was to cause you pain."
For the second time that night, I found myself being kissed. Only this time, it was by the man I truly loved, and always would.