Pocket Plane Group

Miscellany, Inc. => Fan Fiction => Topic started by: Regullus on May 21, 2004, 10:47:46 PM

Title: Comments on "Deadly Nightshade"
Post by: Regullus on May 21, 2004, 10:47:46 PM

    The story has an interesting and engaging beginning. Already your protagonist is attractive and believable. I will look forward to further postings. 

    On the negative, some of the sentences could use some minor re-structuring and there are several small spelling errors, ie, "wears" and it should be wares, etc.

  I think your story has an excellent start in cohesion. In no way am I trying to be disrespectful with my criticisms.  I find your past and present efforts to be  interesting, enjoyable and original. :) I always look forward to a "Domi" story!

Title: Re: Comments on "Deadly Nightshade"
Post by: Domi on May 27, 2004, 04:00:44 PM

Oh, thank you.  :) I'd really like to teach myself how to write better, so I appreciate insightful comments. No, critisism is never off-putting.

Title: Re: Comments on "Deadly Nightshade"
Post by: Kirwond on June 04, 2004, 11:54:23 AM

Poor naive Ladim. :( But I'm sure this minor setback won't hurt him for long.

I'm enjoying the story so far, and I hope to see another chapter soon!